Saturday, 21 March 2009
Thursday, 19 March 2009
- Well, I guess first I have to say that I am a PAOS addict even after I get a positive! So I had some first response early tests (2) and decided that I would test again with fmu just to see if the lines were any darker. Well, I took the test and the lines weren't any darker. I got a positive but it was light. Also when I wiped I thought I noticed some brown blood so I wiped and also checked my cervix. There was a teeny bit not even a spots worth. Well, being the worry bug I am I piled all the kiddos in the van and headed to walmart where I purchased an equate brand test. I have in the past had awful luck with any test that claims to be an early result one but had great results with the equate ones. We had put my fmu in a container and so I went ahead and took the equate test. It is a slower test. It can take a few minutes for it to show up but it did. And it was light but much darker than the early result first response test.
We came home and my children laid hands on me and prayed for me. I called my dh and he was praying too. After that I checked again for any brown blood and there was nothing. Almost as if it was never there...
Anyway, I wish now I wouldn't have tested again as it makes you worry and I worry too easy as it is. I want to enjoy my pregnancy and not worry if my line is dark enough! Some say it matters if they get darker and some say it doesn't! All I know is that G-d knows and my baby is in His hands! There is not a better place for she/he to be!
So right now I feel all alone...I wish I had a friend that understood what it's like to lose a baby... I haven't lost my baby and I am hopeful I will not but even knowing it could happen is hard.. I have had 1 miscarriage and lost my sweet dd RuthAnne. I wish I knew someone who would understand the emotions that go through you.... and sometimes I guess I feel like the things in my life don't matter and that makes me feel ....awful....
Anyway I am rambling on!
The L-rd did give me peace and I am going to rest in that! I know that the L-rd understands and so often in my life that just has to be enough.
Wednesday, 18 March 2009
forgetful and scatter brained
I wonder? Does anybody else struggle with remembering things and feel scatter brained alot? I can't remember stuff and I feel scatter brained. I know I have alot on my plate. I have 9 children that I take care of and one dh. I homeschool my children. I take care of my home. I try to keep 10 other people's lives running and keeping track of what every one of these 10 people are doing or need to do. I have to grocery shop and make meals and potty train and breastfeed two babies and am pg now (and loving it)
. I have to pay bills and plan library trips and remember to take a shower! And the list goes on...I always figured it was because I have so much to keep track of??
I dont know?? I just feel so awful when I forget important things that I should remember but don't. Then all I can do is hope that I will get cut some slack....I don't know...just rambling I guess..
Do other mamas with 8 or more children ever feel like this?? Scatter brained and forgetful?? Forgetting what you said 5-10 minutes ago to one of your children? telling them to come do this and they tell you they are doing this; which is exactly what you told them to do 5-10 min. ago and you FORGOT???
Friday, 13 March 2009
I feel normal..
Well, I feel really normal!
I don't feel very pregnant in the beginning. It takes a few weeks for me to really feel it. Of course I have had some lower abdominal tenderness and some sharp pains in that area too. The pregnancy stuff..
I am feeling no nausea yet. But I am preparing myself for survival mode in a few weeks just incase. I mean I wouldn't even know what to do with myself if I didn't have any nausea??
I keep wondering if this time I might get to skip the nausea?? The only thing I am doing different is drinking my pg tea and taking a good quality prenatal which I haven't done in any of my pgs. Taking the prenatal that is.. Maybe that will be enough for me to skip the m/s? I know that others are praying for me too. So I guess we'll find out soon?? I am just trying to be prepared either way!
At lunch today I noticed everything tasted...well....just not right. I have that when pregnant.
Tuesday, 10 March 2009
- I am experiencing pulling and stretching already. And the crampiness and achiness like I normally have in the first weeks of pregnancy. Do others experience these things??
Today I have had a little bit of nausea but sat. up to yesterday I had it more often. It's the before it hits you full force nausea.It comes and goes and then I usually start to worry and then the REAL nausea hits and I am wishing I could go back to the before it hits full force stuff. So this time I am enjoying these pg days before the REAL stuff hits!
I am guessing at this point the more I contemplate it that I am 3-5 weeks along. I am experiencing what I do when I get a positive which is usually around 4-5 weeks along. Out of all my pregnancies the earliest I have gotten a pos. hpt was 3 weeks so that and my symptoms are where I am getting my estimated gestation.
I am anxious to get further along so I have an even better idea where I am. Can I put in a request that the next 2-3 weeks go by FAST??
Oh! I am taking rainbow prenatal vitamins. And fish oil as of right now. Drinking my pregnancy tea too! :0
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